A Poem for My Birthday

7 Jun

I’m 30 today

(it can’t be spelled out to soften its edge)

I found the city of  the bronze fish

swimming in the grass

that I dreamed of when I was eleven or twelve.

In the dream they carried me, the fish carried me

up a blue staircase

and into a shop with crystal doors where,

behind the gray-bottomed curtain in back,

I beat all the boys at pinball, again and again

(while bright white light – such a white light!- shone through the grimy window from the alley).

When I woke I found the city,

my city of rivers,

one dandelion,

and the bronze fish carried me again.

I loved it like my mother loved San Francisco

(maybe even more, only she can know).

Down the blue staircase have come husband

friends and children (were they the bright light?)

and flowing in the dandelion river have gone the years.

And I have left my bronze fish city

and come back again and again

(behind the gray-bottomed curtain, but the bright light still shines).

It lives in me, and I in it

still with room for more.

After all, it is only 30.

I am only half-formed.

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One Response to “A Poem for My Birthday”

  1. uglicoyote July 8, 2010 at 6:18 pm #

    beautiful poem darlin daughter

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